Sunday, February 9, 2014

We have jobs!

That was the brief pause I took just now to do a celebratory dance. It looked a little bit like this:

Joanna and I are the newest staff writers for Sullivan and Son on TBS. We’ve been employed for two whole weeks now and we couldn’t be more excited. I’m sure we’ll have tons of stories to tell, ¼ of which will be okay to share with you.

When we first got the job offer, a litany of thoughts went through my mind:

Thought #1: Sweet! I have a job!

No longer will I have to come up with new and creative ways to say “I’m unemployed.” (Past euphemisms include “We’re doing our own thing”, “We’re freelancing”, and “We’re waiting to hear back from Anthropologie.”) It’s like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. The burden of finding a job is gone...and replaced with the much heavier burden of doing well in said job and bringing honor to my family. Yaaaaay…?

It's a shame. We would have been great at making these intricate window displays
out of the repurposed notebooks we wrote all our bad ideas in.

Thought #2: Crap. I have to wear real pants.

Working from home has spoiled us in the waistband department. You don’t have to care what you look like when the only person you’re seeing all day has an intimate knowledge of what happens to your body when you eat kale. Lots of yoga pants, shorts, and outfits that can only be described as “panhandling chic” were worn over the past six months. So anything that’s not elastic feels like chain metal.

This was basically us... with 98% more style. BTW, this came up when
I Googled "yoga pants casual." It's a thing!

Thought #3: Sweet! I’ll have easy access to pie!

Working in an office means you get all kinds of free food (doubly so when you’re working in TV. Craft services is the devil in the form of a delightful charcuterie plate). Add that to the fact that we’re on the Warner Bros lot, which has a farmers market every other Wednesday where our friends at I Heart Pies sell their stuff. I’m not kidding when I say this is like the third thing that popped into my mind when I got this job. If you haven’t tasted the magic that is a Butterbeer Pie, you haven’t lived.

Thought #4: Crap. I have to filter my thoughts.

We’re so used to just being around each other that I’m pretty sure I’ve forgotten how to be around other people. You know, normal people. When left to our own devices, Joanna and I can get into some super weird tangents. And we delve into those super weird tangents until we’re like: “Is it bad that we’re talking about the decrepit living state of twentysomethings when we should be writing a My Little Pony script?” So now we have to stay focused and give our new co-workers the impression that we’re “normal”. At least in the beginning. We can only hold back for so long.

I couldn't think of an image to go with this so I Googled "weird" and this came up.

Thought #5: Meh. I’ll have money and that’s all that really matters.

I can buy all the experimental chips I want. #AmericanDream

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